ha ha ha!

Mom, I am laughing out loud! Cara said you saw my post last night and that I deleted it. She said you were worried. Too funny. I was regretting my swear words, even though they really were in the context of "female dog". I will re-post, censored:



"HOUSEBROKEN"

I have been thinking about the term "housewife".

It's creepy.

The first thing that comes to mind... say... if I were doing a word-association psychological evaluation, is "housebroken".

"Is your dog housebroken yet?", says the man to the other man.

"Not quite... but she is going wee wees on newspaper.", says the other man.

"Ours is an outside dog. She sleeps, though, in the garage.", says the man.

____________________________________________________________________


"Does your wife stay at home?", says the man to the other man.

"Yeah... but she does sell tupperware.", says the other man.

"Mine is VP of sales. She sleeps, though, in another mans bed.", says the man.


Is there some sort of status men hold if "their woman" stays at home? What is "stay at home" supposed to mean, anyway? I go lots of places. And what if Brandon is my man?

Is there some sort of status men hold if "their woman" has a high-power job? What is a high-power job anyway? I am controlling. I want one of those.

At the rodeo parade yesterday, a big crew (herd, flock, whatever...) of bikers rolled down Tabernacle. I scanned quickly to find a woman, just one, who was driving one of those bikes. None! You had better believe that if Brandon and I ever join Hells Angels, I'm going to be the one driving. I want to feel that big motor rattle between my thighs as much as the next guy.

Has the feminist movement taught us nothing?We have the vote, so why not the handlebars? Drive that bike, ladies. Make that greasy guy choke on your hair as that free blowin' wind whips across your pretty little face.

Mom, it just occurred to me that you may miss some of my generation's pop culture terms. It is perfectly normal, and funny!, to call Brandon my b*****. It's supposed to make you laugh! I know I am laughing!!!!!!! No more late night posts for me!!!!!!!!!!! It was one of those moments like when you almost posted: Missing Woman, or whatever. And I wish you had posted that!
I have learned to sleep on it.