The Eternal Question

I wrote this a long time ago to post on Nicole's blog for my girlfriends to read and since I am too lazy to write anything new... I thought I'd post it here for y'all.
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I often find myself pondering... Bear Grylls? Or Les Stroud?

Man Vs. Wild stands alone in its ability to trigger my gag reflex as much as... anything else. I especially tune in when he is going somewhere cold because there is a high likelihood of Bear getting wet and taking his clothes off all the way down to his cute little British boxer briefs. Who can refute the hotness:

Faults? A little too hyper. And perhaps a little too hairless. You just know the second the cameras are off he sets down that elephant dung and dines on whatever is flown in for him. Whatever. He was a member of the British Special Forces. Me likey.

But what if you were forced to choose? Would you take the hyper, hairless Brit? Tempting. But I think I prefer my men a little less fancy. Enter Les Stroud:

Hairier than myself. The smallest bit of flab on the midsection. Hmmm. Yes, I like this. His show Survivorman isn't as spastic. He has no crew. He films himself. He is calming. Soothing. Less fancy-pants with less fancy pants. Probably wears faded, threadbare underwear.

So girls. You have to survive in the wilderness with one of these men. I'm sorry but you cannot have both. Who is it going to be? Are you going to let Bear boil you some crawdads in a hole in a rock, holding out hope for the British Skivvies? Or will you let Les shoot you a grouse, taking comfort in his calming presence?

Me? The winner is going to be Les.
A bit more man.
A little less spastic.